seoulwoo:

To You Dance Version

Whenever someone follows me:  

•  ARE YOU LOST
•  ARE YOU SURE
•  DID YOU CLICK THE FOLLOW BUTTON BY MISTAKE
•  DID SOMEONE PAY YOU
•  DID MY MOM SEND YOU
•  ARE YOU MY MOM

9 Favorite Photos of Ikuta Toma

• girl: i'm having vagina surgery
• boyfriend: i know
• girl: i love you
• boyfriend: i love you too
•  after surgery she wakes up and only dad is there
• girl: where is my boyfriend
• dad: who do you think gave you the vagina
• girl: what
•  what the fuck did i just read.

My dad just emailed me this huge list of puns oh my god 

•  I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.
•  When chemists die, they barium.
•  Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
•  I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.
•  I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
•  This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.
•  I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.
•  I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
•  They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O.
•  We’re going on a class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz.
•  Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?
•  Broken pencils are pointless.
•  I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.
•  What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
•  I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
•  All the toilets in New York’s police stations have been stolen. The police have nothing to go on.
•  I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
•  Haunted French pancakes give me the crêpes.
•  A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.
•  The earthquake in Washington obviously was the Government's fault.
•  Be kind to your dentist. He has fillings, too.

• School: I'll do this shit at home
• Home: I'll do this shit at school

• dbsk: hey i just met you
• dbsk: and this is crazy
• dbsk: but here's my number
• dbsk: so call me maybe
• dbsk: LOL JKS SORRY YOU'VE GOT THE WRONG NUMBER, SO DON'T CALL ME NO MORE.